Day 294: A Missed Hike.

No, not that kind of hike.  The other kind of hike.  You know.

Today, some friends of mine were going to hike at Kennesaw Mountain.  I was housesitting in Kennesaw, so the mountain was like 15 minutes away. 

Result:  I didn't go.  Why?  I didn't want to. 

Simple as that.  And I felt okay about my decision.  So there. 

Let the laziness continue . . .

Day 293: A Missed Meetup.

Earlier today, I went to Manuel's Tavern in Atlanta for the Atlanta Skeptics meetup.  It was pretty freakin' cool--it was a presentation on ESP.  Long story short, when I got home, I bought some ESP cards on Amazon to use with my skeptic/secular student group.  I forget what they're called, but they're official, I swear.

There was to be another meetup later in the day at Manuel's, at 7pm, that I wanted to go to.  But I was petsitting, so I had to drive to Kennesaw to let dogs out. 

Fast forward to 630pm.  I had to take a nap because I was feeling physically awful.  I didn't set my alarm, I felt so bad.  I woke up at 630pm = It's too late for me to get ready and head over there and actually get a seat.

I was sad about missing the meetup.  But instead, I hung out with my friends Lani and Bill.  And that was fun.  So it still ended up being a good evening :-)  Friends for the win!

Day 292: To EEG or not to EEG.

This girl has got it made.  She can just sit there and do nothing.  My professor makes us stare at a little dot on a computer screen for 15 minutes.  Seriously.

Every Friday, (well, most Fridays), one of my professors at school does EEG experiments.  Usually I plan on going, but I usually don't because I ended up being too tired or not feeling well or whatever the case may be. 

But today, I had to drop off lab reports to another professor anyways, so I figured I'd go do the EEG thing too.  Yay.

Result:  I ended up being a co-EEG-runner for my professor.  Another girl and I ran the EEG on our professor.  I had to literally stick glue through little holes by using a blunt needle.  I was scared to death of hurting the poor guy with my blunt needle.

But I didn't hurt him at any point, and we got the EEG to work correctly.  And then when it was done,  we cleaned out the goo by using a pipe cleaner and water.  And that was that.  And my professor loaded programming software onto my laptop so that I can learn how to do programming.  Sweet!

So I am very glad that I went today to do the EEG thing.  Yay!

Day 291: Social Fail.

He doesn't look very lonely.  But whatever.

Today, I went out with some friends at school to Mellow Mushroom.

Fast forward to 5pm.  I was feeling sad and lonely, so I left and went home.  I even skipped meeting up with other friends at 6pm.  I don't even remember what I did when I got home, I probably slept.  Because that's how I deal with loneliness--I sleep.  It's the least destructive thing I can think of that still allows me to get through the negative feelings.

How can you be lonely while still being around people, even friends?  It's simple.

I'll let you figure it out on your own.  (Hint:  It's not friend loneliness.)

Day 290: TA Fail.

Damnit, Dwight!!!

I'm a teaching assistant for one of my school's professors.  Today was class from 12:30-3:15.  At the beginning of class, he gave me the lab reports that I needed to grade, and I asked if I could leave and grade the papers at home.  He let me leave, yay for nice professors!

Result:  I went straight to sleep and slept for several hours.  I have no idea why, but I was SUPER tired, even though I had gotten enough sleep.

I graded the lab reports the next day.  And I tell ya, that sleep felt damn good.

Day 289: Tabling Fail.

Thank you, Fail Whale.  I feel much better now.

Today, my student group tabled in the Clendenin building on my school's campus.  This is the computer science building, and it's connected to the science building.  Surely there will be heathens here who will be interested in our skeptic/secular student group!

Result:  Fail.  Seriously, the Burruss (business) building might have been more successful than this building.  It was terrible. 

We will be sticking strictly to the Social Science building.  At least people like us there.

Day 288: The Mystery Continues.

I FINALLY went to my school's health clinic to see if I could figure out what has been causing a year long rash on the bottom half of my legs.  A week ago, they had taken a sample and sent it to a lab.  They also gave me 10 days' worth of antibiotics in an attempt to kill whatever is causing my rashes.

Result:  It's not an infection.  And my itchiness has definitely been reduced.  But I still seriously have no idea what is causing it.  And it's super duper frustrating.  But in the meantime, let the itching continue.

Day 287: A Missed Party.

Today was a friend's birthday party.  I had planned to go. 

Result:  I didn't go.  I was petsitting and needed to be at their house for when they returned.

Or maybe I hadn't slept well and was really tired.

I think it was both really.

Either way, I missed the party.  Sad face.  But what can you do?

Day 286: My Life Story.

This picture describes my everyday life pretty well.  For years, I have had a difficult time falling asleep.  Everyone always falls asleep before me.  It really sucks.  I really wish I had the ability to turn my thoughts off.  But I don't.  FAIL.

Art Show Schmart Show. I Don't Need No Stinkin' Art Show.

Fernbank Museum in Atlanta is currently doing an art exhibit on Darwin.  I was planning on going with some friends tonight through a science meetup group.

Result:  I thought I was going to be housesitting in Atlanta; instead, I'm petsitting very close to where I live (45 min. from Atlanta).  So instead, I ended up skipping the art show and have been hanging out with my friends Bill and Lani.

I think it was a good decision :-)

Day 284: I Miss You, Toastmasters. Really.

I haven't been to my Toastmasters group's meetings in a while.  Why?  I'm afraid of failing.  Seriously. 

I'm retarded (or is it pathetic?) sometimes.

Day 283: I'm STILL Reading This Book??

I STILL have not finished reading this book.  In fact, I've read very little of it this past 2 months.  Why?  Because it kind of sucks.  I mean, it's obvious that the author put a ton of work into this book.  But it's just SO FREAKING LONG.

Some day I WILL finish this book.  Really.  I'll even make it my goal to finish it by January 1, 2012.  So there.

Day 282: SCI Movie Night

Tonight, we did a movie night for our school's skeptic/secular group. We watched a DVD on evolution from the Howard Hughes Medical Institute.

Result: The classroom was locked, and we couldn't get anyone to open it for us. Long story short, the writing center let us use their conference room.

It was nerve wracking and frustrating and annoying, but . . . everything went well in the end :-)

Day 281: Missed Commitments.

(What does this picture mean?  I have no idea.)

I was planning on going to a FED meeting today.  I was also planning on going to Atlanta to play trivia with friends.

Result:  I did neither.  Instead, I went home and took a nap.  I think it was a good decision. :-)

Day 280: A Skipped Day.

Today was the last day of the TX Freethought Convention.  Richard Dawkins was going to speak today.

I ended up just skipping the whole day for several reasons.

1.  I had a 12 hour drive ahead of me, plus an hour time change, not in my favor.
2.  A huge huge thunderstorm was headed towards Houston, and I did not want to end up driving in that.
3.  I had already heard Dawkins speak the day before. 
4.  I have class at 8am the next morning.
5.  I haven't had a super spectacular time and am ready to be home.

It's almost a week later, and I'm still totally cool with the fact that I skipped that day.  So yay for not judging myself too much about this :-)

Day 279: Loneliness. Hi Again.

So, I'm still at this conference.  And . . .

The conference itself has been good.  But I can't say I have been having a good time.  I went knowing that there wouldn't be anyone there that I really know personally, at least other than just aquaintances.  And my goal was to be open and make new friends.

That didn't go so well.  I mean, I did go out to eat with some new friends on Friday night.  But they were MUCH older than me, and I didn't want to be like a leech and hang out with them the whole weekend. 

The lunch and dinner breaks were 1.5 hours each--a very long break in my opinion.  So I would just walk back and forth from the hotel to the hostel.  I walked 6 miles on Saturday alone.  It would take 30 minutes to walk each way, so that alone would take up 1 hour.

Saturday evening I got in bed and just cried and cried.  I felt like such a loser.  But . . .

I even skipped the conference on Sunday and drove home at 9am.  I was definitely glad to be home.

Day 278: Walking Directions are No Better.

I stayed at a hostel 1 mile from where the convention was being held.  Parking was not cheap.  So, I decided to walk from the hostel to the hotel.  It's only a mile away.  I have a map AND walking directions.  How difficult can it be?

Result:  I have found out that a lack of a sense of direction while driving also applies to a sense of direction while walking. 

I figured it out eventually, and got better each time, but it sure was frustrating!  I did get a lot of exercise, though. :-)

Day 277: I accept it . . .

I have no sense of direction.  Seriously.

I drove to Houston today for a freethought conference.  I didn't get lost until I got to Houston.  It took me FOREVER to find the place I was staying at.  I definitely was not in a good mood by the end of the drive.

Having no sense of direction SUCKS.  But what doesn't suck is the fact that I accept this about myself.  If there is one thing that I accept about myself, it is this.  Obviously, after 30 years, there's not much I can do about it--it would have improved by now if it could.

So yay for not taking myself too seriously :-)

Day 276: A Missed Meeting

I'm taking a field practicum class this semester.  Basically, I have to volunteer a lot in the field that I want to work in.  That field is clinical psychology.  Unfortunately, as an undergrad, there is very little I can do in the field.  Which makes sense--you don't want someone untrained trying to treat someone with a disorder.

So one of the things that I can do is attend support groups, such as ANAD and FED (Families of Eating Disorders).  I was going to go to ANAD today, but . . .

I skipped it.  I wanted to go, but I'm going out of town tomorrow for 4 days, and so I needed to do some school stuff and pack and such.

Soooo, I am not making much progress in terms of volunteering. :-(  But there's only so much I can do really.

Day 275: King James Bible Ignorance Continues

Today, my school's library had a panel discussion on the history of the King James Bible and how it came to be such a popular and well-known version of the Bible.  I was totally planning on going.

Result:  It started at 530pm.  Normally I have a meeting from 3-430pm every Tuesday, so I was going to hang out on campus and work on school work until 530pm.  Well, my meeting ended 45 minutes early, so I ended up just going home.  I didn't feel like hanging around campus for 1.75 hours. 

I ended up not doing much at home, as I knew would be the case.  I ended up taking a long nap, which wasn't surprising to me.  (I hadn't taken a nap in 3 days; thus ended my no nap streak.) 

I still think it would have been cool to attend that lecture, because I know nothing of the history of the KJ Bible.  But . . . what can you do?  I skipped the lecture and got sleep instead.  You can only learn so much in a lifetime anyways. :-)

Day 274: I Have NO Sense of Direction. Continued . . .

You know how for many many years I would judge myself negatively for everything?  (I've gotten MUCH better about that thanks to this blog, but that is beside the point.)  Well, if there is ONE thing I accept about myself (and I do), it's the fact that I have absolutely very very little sense of direction.  I've lived in the Atlanta area for 20 years, and I still get lost quite frequently, even with directions, even when I'm in an area I've been in several times before.

Today was no different.  I was headed to Rose and Crown Tavern in Atlanta in order to attend a book club meeting.  I got directions from Google Maps.  Well, Google Maps brought me to a part of Powers Ferry Road that was NOT where this place was.  Not only that, it wasn't even close to where the place actually was.

I came VERY close several times to just going home.  It's tiring to try and figure out where you're going when you have the wrong directions and you're stuck in Atlanta with a bunch of traffic.  But I ploughed through it, and an hour + later, I ended up at my location.

I was very proud of myself for not giving up and for eventually figuring out where the hell I was going :-)  So suck it, Google maps!  (Thanks mapquest for getting me to my destination CORRECTLY.)

Day 273: Overeat Much?

(This picture made me lol.)

Today I went to a good friend's house to watch the Steelers football game. 

Result:  My friend bought and laid out a ton of yummy food, right in front of my face, right in front of the tv.  And it was just the two of us.  I thought it was super nice of her to go to the store and buy yummy food for just me and her, and I hadn't eaten anything before that, sooooooo . . .

I totally overate.  And not just a little, but a lot.  It was like a binge, but not quite.

I used to overeat VERY frequently.  Like, on a daily basis.  But for the last several months (maybe even the last year), I have rarely overeaten (yay therapy and working through emotional issues!).  But I had overeaten another day this week, and so this was the 2nd day that I overate. 

If I REALLY let myself, I can eat forever.  Seriously.  So I have to sometimes make myself stop eating because otherwise I will just eat forever.  (I don't get much of a fullness feeling when I eat.  Unless it's oatmeal.  One can only eat so much of oatmeal, and that's not much.)  Well, today I just let myself eat and eat and eat, and eventually I made myself stop.

The good thing about this was that I didn't judge myself harshly for it.  In the past, I would have berated myself and hated myself for being out of control.  But today (and the other day this week that I overate), I just accepted it and that was that.  That was a big step for me :-)  Yay progress!

Day 272: Devereux Training

Today was training for volunteers who want to work with children and adolescents at Devereux, the place I'm volunteering for in order to gain clinical experience and get credit for my Field Practicum class.

I really had no idea what to expect.  All I knew was that we were going to be learning restraint, and the only image I had in my mind was like using a straightjacket or something in order to restrain unruly or unsafe kids.

Result:  First, we learned CPR.  We spent 2 hours on that alone.  We followed along to an American Heart Association DVD in order for the training to be done correctly; I thought that was really cool because it is reliability and validity in action (we learn about that a lot in psychology).  The in-class trainer made us go through each step and made sure we each did the steps correctly before moving onto the next step.  By the end of the training, we were all CPR certified!  I thought it was really cool that I now got a 2 year certification from the American Heart Association for CPR training.

After that, we learned restraint moves to use when kids are in attack mode basically.  We learned how to block punches and kicks, how to shuffle away from them, what to do if someone grabs your hair or your shirt, and some other moves.  My favorite move was the take-down move, when you need to take someone to the ground and then get extra assistance to keep them down and hold them down (i.e. so that they can't kick you or someone else or whatever).  I volunteered to be taken down, and it was fun to see that I was super strong and able to get out of a hold easily, even with 4 people holding me down.  Yeah, I felt bad-ass.  And then I helped take people down, and again, I was super strong.  Sweet!

So yeah, there were times where I totally failed at some of the CPR training (before I figured out how to do it correctly) and times where I did the restraint moves incorrectly.  But the in-class trainer made us do everything correctly before we could move onto the next stage.  SO in this case, practice did make perfect for all of us :-)

Day 271: A Missed EEG Day

I am assisting a professor with research during this semester.  Every Friday he has research assistants run and use an EEG machine for research he is doing.

Today, I didn't go to the research.  I don't know why, but oftentimes, Fridays are really bad days for my physically.  I rarely do anything productive on Fridays because I'm usually really tired.  So today, I slept a lot.  I also had really bad stomach issues all day, so I just stayed home. 

On Monday, I was running research with students, and after I was done, he happened to come in and make sure everything ran smoothly.  I told him that I can't always make it on Fridays because sometimes it's a bad day for me physically, and he was very understanding.  I was very appreciative of that :-)

So, I'm proud of myself for taking care of myself this day.

Day 270: Blasphemy Rights Day

Today was International Blasphemy Rights Day, a day started by the Center for Inquiry after the whole Mohammed cartoon debacle that happened (I think) 3 years ago.  It's a day to celebrate free speech and be grateful for the fact that we here in the United States can show and create images like the one shown in the picture above without fear of being killed for it.  Not all countries have that freedom, so it's a day to bring forth awareness of that fact and to work towards free speech for all.

So, I decided to hold an event for Blasphemy Rights Day at my school.

Result:  We had posters with different prompts on them, such as "School is...," "God is...," "Homosexuality is...," and students could come up and write whatever they wanted.  It was really fun to see what people would write, and some of them were quite funny.  No one wrote anything hateful or mean or anything like that, which was interesting.  Most of the people that wrote on our posters had similar viewpoints as our student group.  Not a whole lot of people who are "opposed" to our group approach us, even though we are there for anyone to come talk to us. 

I didn't know how the event would go, but overall, it went really well, and it was fun :-)